Road to Wrestlemania XXVII, Part Five

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This is part five of the X-Blog’s Road to Wrestlemania series, where each week I will do my best to prognosticate what the card of Wrestlemania XXVII will look like based solely on the events of the past week in WWE. So, be warned, because this might contain spoilers.

Less than a month to go before Wrestlemania. As time draws nearer, the card gets more resolved and I get less and less inclined to actually buy the PPV.

SPECULATED MATCHES

United States & Intercontinental Championships: So much for my speculation into this match. Daniel Bryan gets beat senseless on RAW, and I mean that in the way it sounds and that it made absolutely no sense for Miz to attack him like that. Here’s an idea… if you want your WWE Champion to look strong by beating someone down, how’s about you LET HIM BEAT DOWN HIS CHALLENGER!!! I digress and I’ll continue that later in the proper bracket, but Daniel Bryan did not need that. Now rumors are circulating that he’ll face Sheamus – who similarly got a beat down this past Monday on RAW that at least was sensible – at Wrestlemania for the US Championship match or in some weird mixed tag match with The Bellas and Gail Kim & Eve. No! Daniel Bryan’s debut match at Wrestlemania cannot be a mixed tag with divas involved. I will not stand for that. Kofi Kingston, the second part of this spec, didn’t even make an appearance on Smackdown this week. That can’t be good news.

Money In The Bank: Wrestlemania draws nearer and not a peep has been said about a proposed Money in the Bank Ladder Match. I’m split on this decision because MITB, while a novel idea at it’s inception, has become overexposed lately. It’s gone from a simple six-man ladder match to an eight-man match to a ten-man match. Now, it’s got its own freakin’ pay-per-view. That’s how you spell overexposed: PPV. But the truth is, WWE doesn’t have to mention this match at all – at least not until the last week before Wrestlemania. They usually try to have a safe show week for the superstars involved in the main event matches, so what better way to do that than to waste a week with nothing but MITB qualifying matches? I don’t put it past them to do just this. In fact, I’m sure it’s been proposed already.

Divas Match: If the match described above with The Bellas wasn’t bad enough, there’s another mixed tag being rumored involving Dolph Ziggler & LayCool vs Drew McIntyre, Kelly Kelly & Trish Stratus… WTF!!!??? I don’t want to see either of these matches. Of course the alternative is a singles/handicap match for the Divas Championship between The Bellas and Eve Torres or some catastrophe of a battle royal. No matter what happens here, we all lose.

RUMORED/EXPECTED MATCHES

Rey Mysterio vs Cody Rhodes: Cody Rhodes made the offer for a match this past Friday on Smackdown and all that’s left is a acceptance from Rey Mysterio. I said in the Smackdown KJR that the whole ‘mask vs mask’ match is tired – and it is. However, I’m changing my tune now that I’ve had some time to think about this. If Cody Rhodes wins and is allowed to remove Rey Mysterio’s mask, there’s no better opening for a Sin Cara debut than at that exact moment in time. Sin Cara saves Mysterio from exposure and instantly marks his place in the hearts of babyface/superhero-loving fans everywhere. Not to mention he enters Smackdown with a ready-to-go decent rivalry with Cody Rhodes as well. It’s a win-win for everyone involved… except Mysterio maybe, but I don’t really care about him.

Tag Team Championships: It looks as if the Nexus vs Corre rivalry is all but dead. I wanted it to happen, but like I’ve said before WWE doesn’t have the best history in making heel vs heel matches entertaining. I will give WWE some credit for allowing The Corre to look strong by beating Santino & Kozlov soundly on Smackdown… before getting their asses handed to them by Kane & Big Show later on. It’s a good segue from previous challengers to the next. And while this whole suddenly-babyfaced-turned Kane is a spit in the face of continuity everywhere, I have to admit that Kane & Big Show were pretty decent Tag Team Champions a couple years back and they could bring some much-needed respect back to that division if they were to become champions again. Plus, Big Show might’ve been the flunky in Jeri-Show & ShoMiz partnerships, but he was there and they both worked.

CONFIRMED MATCHES

Jerry Lawler vs Micheal Cole w/Jack Swagger: Again, I’ll say this: WWE is doing an excellent job in hyping up this match. In fact, it might be the best hyped match they’ve got going for them so far. There’s promise, but there won’t be any payoff. Regardless of who the Special Guest Referee is in this match – even if it’s the returning Stone Cold Steve Austin himself, they can’t make this match interesting. Just look what Steve Austin did for Brock vs Goldberg… And poor Jack Swagger. He’s gone from World Champion to training an announcer to wrestle. Oh how the mighty has fallen. It gets doubly worse when you remember that he defeated Chris Jericho for the World Championship – something Edge couldn’t even accomplish last year at Wrestlemania XXVI.

Randy Orton vs CM Punk: I’ve made a complete 180 degree turn from last week to now. Last week, I was psyched for this match. Monday, I thought it was a good idea to have Nexus fight against Orton to see if they can accompany Punk to ringside. Then I had time to think about it and there’s a reason why I call my RAW/Smackdown/PPV recaps ‘Knee-Jerk Reactions’: because sometimes I get so caught up in the action that I don’t see the entire picture. The entire picture of this match has Orton taking out Nexus one by one, Punk exacting revenge from two years ago and the rest of the picture is pure whiteness. There’s nothing else there. What are the feuding for? What do they have to gain? Yes, Orton punted Punk in the head, but then Punk cost Orton the WWE Championship. Is that not quid pro quo? I like Randy Orton and I love CM Punk, but a match that’s getting this much attention needs to have an endgame. If they just made this a #1 Contender’s match, then I’d be behind it again because I’d something to root Punk on for. As it stands, I want Punk to win, but why?

Undertaker vs Triple H: Triple H got his revenge on Sheamus this past Monday. I guess that’s something. But what of Undertaker and Kane? Or Wade Barrett? Or any of the Barrett-led Nexus members? Surely, the deadman is the forgiving type. And the reasoning for this match is all kind of screwed up. Basically, both Triple H and Undertaker just crapped all over everybody in the entire WWE locker room, putting over no one else but themselves. Why does that sound so familiar? Maybe it’s because that the status quo. The reason why anyone ever challenges Undertaker at Wrestlemania is because they want to be the first and only superstar to defeat him there. What Triple H said isn’t any different than each pre-Wrestlemania promo of the past eight years. But it’s supposed to be. This HHH vs Undertaker match is supposed to be an epic. A showstopper. A card-breaker. But it’s no more special than the worst match on the card. I doubt anyone will be able to match the effect HBK had two years ago in the buildup to his first match with Undertaker at Wrestlemania XXV, but they could at least try. Come on WWE, put some effort into it! Make us buy this match. Hell, make us buy this PPV. A war of words (and no words) isn’t going to sell anything.

World Heavyweight Championship: I’m finding it more and more difficult to believe the animosity in this rivalry. It’s because WWE is hyping this match all wrong. They’re trying to make Edge, who isn’t the greatest babyface in the company, act like a Cena-esque babyface. Edge is making jokes about Alberto Del Rio and painting mustaches on his portrait and pulling other juvenile stunts instead of doing what he’s best at – being a little loopy. Edge is at his best when he’s bloodshot and dangerous, and it works just as well as a babyface as it does when he’s heel. Del Rio should be the one who is happy-go-lucky. Del Rio should be the one who doesn’t take Edge seriously. Del Rio believes it’s his destiny to win at Wrestlemania XXVII, so he should act the part. Edge, being the experienced veteran, should know just how important Wrestlemania and the World Championship actually is – and he should act like that. After Edge ended this past Smackdown bloodied and broken, they should come around to this – but they should have been doing it already. As it stands right now, I believe Christian has more animosity towards Del Rio than Edge does. That needs to change ASAP.

WWE Championship: I hate to say this, but I think The Rock’s involvement in this match spells doom (HA!) for The Miz. Two weeks going now, Miz has had his say about The Rock, yet for some reason all The Rock responds to is John Cena. Yes, Cena is the bigger dog in this fight, but Miz is the reigning champion. That should stand for something. Now with Alex Riley out of the picture (I told you I’d get back to this), Miz is at an even bigger disadvantage. He couldn’t beat Cena cleanly with Riley at ringside, so what chance does he have now? WWE is supposed to be making their reigning champion look more formidable going towards Wrestlemania – not less. And while him beating down Daniel Bryan makes him look a little stronger, DANIEL BRYAN IS NOT JOHN CENA!!! John Cena is John Cena. And John Cena is the guy he has to face at Wrestlemania. Maybe, just maybe, they could allow him to beat down Cena as bad as he did to Daniel Bryan. Although, I doubt it’d matter any way because Cena sells nothing – therefore making Miz look even weaker through his invulnerability. It’s like Lex Luthor trying to kill Superman… sure he has some tricks up his sleeve, but it’s freaking Superman! Luthor finally succeeded by using the power of the sun – the freaking sun, which Superman gets his power from – and it only almost killed Superman. But this analogy actually works. Lex Luthor used Superman’s power source against him. Miz needs to use Cena’s power source (the fans) against him. Having The Rock turn more and more fans against Cena is a start. Too bad it isn’t being done for Miz’s benefit.